From the Pages of History

Stories, Pictures, Quotes & Trivia (and more) that tell the story of the world.

Jokes from the USSR


I just got done taking the “Rise and Fall of the Soviet Union” DSST for college credit, so I enjoyed these jokes 😀

*** *** ***

Lenin is dying, and talking things over with Stalin, his successor.

“The one worry I have,” says Lenin, “is this: will the people follow you? What do you think, comrade Stalin?”

“They will,” says Stalin, “they surely will.”

“I hope so,” says Lenin, “but what if they don’t follow you?”

“No problem,” says Stalin, “then they’ll follow you.”

*** *** ***

Stalin decides to go out one day and see what it’s really like for the workers, so he puts on a disguise and sneaks out of the Kremlin.

After a while he wanders into a cinema. When the film has finished, the Soviet Anthem plays and a huge picture of Stalin appears on the screen. Everyone stands up and begins singing, except Stalin, who smugly remains seated.

A minute later a man behind him leans forwards and whispers in his ear: “Listen Comrade, we all feel exactly the same way you do, but trust me, it’s a lot safer if you just stand up.”

*** *** ***

From http://bzebza.com/

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